And so little time to say it. I have two totally different topics I feel like discussing today. They're SO widely different that I think I'll split them into two posts. First, I'd like to get some gripes off my chest in the form of a letter.
Dear Clemson Undergraduates,
Welcome back! In your absence, it seems that you have forgotten a few basic items. Since life has gone on as normal here, allow me to remind you of a few things.
First, use the crosswalks. They were invented for the sole purpose of helping you to NOT DIE. In order for them to function properly, you must use them. While we're discussing crossing the street, let's mention that it isn't the brightest idea to step out without looking, particularly if you have headphones on. I'm not that much older than you, but I feel like I should warn you: you aren't invincible. If you and my car were in a cage match, my car would win. So would all of your fellow classmates' trucks.
Second, slow down. Neither Clemson Avenue nor 93 have been replaced with the Autobahn. Your parents who will probably have to pay your tickets, would appreciate it if you remember this. So would the pedestrians.
Third, be quiet. Actually, I don't even care that you are loud. It's your timing and your topics. Just try to remember that when, at 2am, you decide to loudly break up with your significant other in the parking lot of the Lutheran church, we hear you. Sometimes we even watch you. We don't really want to hear "oh please take me back baby, I promise I won't make out with another guy while drunk again" at all, let alone in the middle of the night.
Fourth, be aware. Please realize that you are not the only human on the planet. I know the shopping carts at Wal-Mart are large, but so are their aisles. Please quit taking up more space than your little over-tanned person actually needs. You aren't that big.
Now, if you can just remember this, we can live in peaceful harmony here in Clemson. You'll thank me when you turn prematurely crotchety like me.
Laura
